I’m going to celebrate my 60th birthday next month. That’s a big number. One of those milestones that gives a person pause, and sends them into inventory mode.
In preparation for this auspicious decade, I’m getting my 60 mile service. Now that I’m double vaxxed, all the appointments are lined up. Beginning with my mouth. Nothing says “you’re old af” better than staring at an X-ray of your cracked and decaying teeth for the better part of a morning. See that one on the left? With the baby shark-shaped filling? That’s the main culprit. Cracked from side to side (thanks pandemic tooth grinding). There’s another wayward molar off-screen, in the opposite quadrant of my still-numb mouth. (During the perilous drilling/dental damming time, I closed my eyes and thought of stupid song lyric puns such as, Crowns to the left of me, fillings to the right… and so on.)
I’m TMIing this to you, my dear friends, not as a doom-and-gloom complaint, or even to elicit pity (though once the numbness wears off I’m anticipating being plenty whiny). No, this post is all about coming to terms with aging, and even embracing the golden years that lie ahead. And because this is a blog about writing, that’s where I’m headed with this diatribe.
Most of my clients fall into the 55+ category, and I’ve been noticing that the year of COVID has largely solidified their determination to get their projects completed and in the best shape to find their eventual audiences. For many, this has caused them to rethink their original plans to go the traditional publishing route.
It’s a hard dream to let go of though. The fantasy of first being “chosen” by an agent, then getting a lucrative (or even modest) book deal with a major publisher is a tough one to give up.
Luckily, there are now several really good hybrid publishers (though, caveat, they tend to be spendy), and also plenty of DIY resources for those who want full control of their book babies. I’ve been delighted to see so many fabulous writers—writers who have invested time and resources to make their books stand out and represent their talent and tenacity—steer their writing careers with intent. Instead of querying for months and months with crossed fingers and held breath, these writers are doing the choosing.
What these writers I’m referring to (i.e. my clients) have in common, is that they’ve spent years building community. A community in which they actively promote the books of others, offer beta reads and critiques, as well as celebrate success and commiserate when things go awry.
The hybrid or indie pub route isn’t for everyone, of course. And there are great deals and publication matches made every day. That said, life is finite. At some point, we need to take that brutal inventory—stare down the images of reality, whether they be aging teeth or those drawer manuscripts that still speak to you.
As one of my dear clients said recently, “I’m tired of the one-armed bandit slog of sending and wishing. I don’t need to wish anymore. I have what I need to make my dream come true.”
How are your dreams coming along?
I actually felt this way about my first novel, because I'd just come back from having cancer and was feeling the truth of mortality--that's why I started my querying process with the small presses, rather than with agents. Since then, I've had folks suggest to me (or maybe this is my own projection) that I could have aimed higher, and maybe I could have. I suppose my attitude with my current WIP is that I will query agents, because with both an anthology and a novel out, I don't quite feel the same need to publish ASAP.
The thing I think is the worst is when a writer who's had their heart set on a literary career gives up because they didn't find an agent, or that agent couldn't sell their book. There are way too many other (good!) options! Life is too short to let gatekeepers kill your dreams.
Two previously agented books which didn't sell. Now with this new WIP I'm not hot to get another agent. But neither am I ready to pay to publish.